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“OK, you don’t have a name yet, but you roam the backwoods roads with your sawdusty biscuits hoping to stumble upon some hapless wayfarer. And your stick, swung at someone’s head from behind, is lethal. You are a genetic mutation, as evidenced by only three fingers and one thumb. And who walks around barefoot, unless they have the hooves of Satan?” Robert Sietsema on the Tennessee Pride Mascot, from his list of “10 Food Product Mascots That Give Us Nightmares.”
